If I Should Fall From Grace
by PhoenixLoganSummers
Summary: War rages in Westeros and while the whole kingdom is doubting the parentage of three of the royal children, there is one child who is Robert Baratheon's offspring without a shadow of a doubt. Rowan Baratheon. Whilst his older brother Joffrey destroys the kingdom there are those who want Rowan to lead them against Joffrey, but can he bring himself to destroy the family he loves?
1. Prince Rowan

Cersei felt her newest child slide into the world and felt a sense of relief that it was over. She heard the babes' first cry and saw her handmaiden gather the babe in her arms, put a cloth around it and walk towards Cersei. Cersei remembered this moment when Joffrey had been born, and Cersei gathered the baby in her arms. She saw it was a boy, a younger brother for Joffrey and an older brother for those children she had yet to bear. It would be her, Jaime and their children with their golden hair and green eyes. But all her dreams were shattered as she pulled back the blanket from her child's head to see his hair. Instead of the golden locks she had expected, the babes' hair was thick and dark. He was not Jaime's son, he was Robert's, and Cersei couldn't believe it. He opened his eyes and Cersei saw the bright green orbs that showed him to be a Lannister, but from every other angle, he was a Baratheon.

She heard knocking on her bedchamber door and her handmaiden opened it. Cersei heart filled with joy at the sight of Jaime striding through the door, but then her heart sank as she realised she could not give him what he had come for, his child. Jaime knelt beside her and took the baby from her arms, but as he did so he saw the mess of dark hair and instantly knew the babe was not his. His face showed shock and anger,

"How?" Jaime asked of her, "How could this have happened?"

"I don't know" Cersei answered truthfully, "The timing of his birth is right he should have been yours…"

"But he is not!" Jaime shouted and the baby in his arms started to cry softly. Jaime gave the child back to Cersei who cradled him in her arms. "If I had known he was not mine I would have taken you to have to disposed of. Now it had only made things more complicated." Cersei knew what her brother was suggesting but could not bring herself to say it. "There are some vials in the maester's chambers that if mixed together will give the child a terrible ill, I have seen some mother's in the streets begging for it as they cannot raise the children themselves, you are lucky I am able to get it for you easily. The child will die quickly once it has been administered, I will not have you suffering for that son of an ass!" Jaime shouted the last words and the baby cried again. Jaime strode from the room to collect the vials that would end her child's life.

Cersei had laboured for a day to bring Joffrey into the world, and even then he wouldn't stop crying. This boy was different, it had been only a few hours labour and the baby had quietened almost immediately. She had once loved Robert and this baby reminded her of why, the dark hair, the strong jawline and the handsome chiselled features. The baby wrapped its tiny fingers around Cersei's thumb and gave a tiny yawn, but Cersei saw the green in his eyes as he closed them, and knew in that moment that she could never let him go.

Robert returned from his hunt later that day and Cersei had never been so pleased to see him. When Jaime had returned with the vials, Cersei had told him that she would not let him kill the babe. He had been very angry and cursed Cersei for being so weak and feeble. If it had been anyone else Cersei would have been afraid that they would kill the child anyway, but Cersei knew that Jaime would never go directly against her wishes if it would cause her pain. Nevertheless, Cersei was glad to see Robert return for once. Robert visited her in her bedchambers as she was still too weak to leave her bed. Her husband presented her with a fine cloak and she, in turn, handed him his child. When Cersei had handed him Joffrey to hold, it was only a formality, so Robert could name him and then begin a great feast, which was all Robert really wanted. But when Robert held this boy in his arms, Cersei saw something in his eyes he had not seen before. Love. Robert was holding this sleeping wonder not because he had to but because he wanted to.

He commanded everyone to leave them alone and soon only Cersei, Robert and their baby son were in the room. Robert then walked to the window, which overlooked the whole of King's Landing, and began to whisper to the child. For several minutes King Robert, the brave, the strong, the mighty, was enthralled by black haired sleeping baby. Soon he wandered back to Cersei and handed her back the babe.

"What shall we call him?" Robert asked. Cersei looked up puzzled, Robert hadn't cared about what Joffrey was called, it was a name she and Jaime had chosen.

"I….I don't know. What would you suggest?" Robert took the baby in his arms again and held him before saying,

"Rowan." Cersei considered this for a moment.

"Yes. I like that. Rowan it is."

"Born today, Prince Rowan, the first of his name, of Houses Lannister and Baratheon, may you grow strong and able, brave and wise.


	2. Brotherly Love

**Sorry it's been so long since the update, i've been busy with exams and coursework. Only going to be a short chapter this time so sorry about that, but i hope to add more soon.**

Several years had passed and Rowan had become a big brother to Myrcella. Joffrey had grown more brattish with age whereas Rowan had matured and was kind and loving, but was quick to make his anger known. Cersei could still not look Jaime in the eye when she was with Rowan, and although her greatest love was for her eldest child, Rowan held a part of her heart, and as much as she tried, she could not break his grasp on it.

Robert had grown to despise Joffrey with a passion, but often took Rowan on hunts, and gave him pride of place beside him during tournaments. However this love came at a cost, as Joffrey grew to resent Rowan more and more, whilst Rowan felt only love and adoration for his elder brother.

"Joffrey! Joffrey!" Rowan cried out, running up the tower stairs towards Joffrey's room. "Are you there Joff? I wanted to play with my new sword and Father is busy. Will you play with me Joff?" Rowan's breathless face appeared in Joffrey's bedroom doorway and he smiled as he saw his brother sprawled out on the grand double bed in the centre of the room. However, Joffrey scowled at his little brother and tutted at him.

"Don't be such a baby Row. Only little kids play with wooden swords."

"But Mother says that I'm too young to have a real sword. She said that I'm not allowed one until I'm 8. That's only a year though", Rowan protested. Joffrey scoffed at his brother and the delighted look on Rowan's face began to fade.

"Mother only said that because she doesn't trust you. I had a real sword when I was 6, because I'm better than you." Joffrey slid off his bed and wandered towards his brother. "Mother doesn't love you, Uncle Jaime doesn't love you, Father doesn't love you..."

"He does too!" Rowan cried out in anger. His brother's words were like daggers in his heart, because they were true. His Uncle seemed to despise him, always favouring Joffrey to him and his mother seemed indifferent. But his father seemed to genuinely care about him, and he loved his father more than the rest of them.

"In fact," Joffrey continued "The only one who really loves you is the freaky dwarf creature" Joffrey cackled and Rowan could feel tears welling up in his eyes. But he would not cry, only babies cry, and Joffrey would torment him even more. So Rowan took a deep breath and simply walked away, as he would do many times in years to come, with Joffrey's laughter still ringing in his ears.

Cersei stood frozen outside Joffrey's doorway, listening to her sons argue, but feeling powerless to stop it. She kew that Joffrey had been given a real sword earlier, but that was only because he would have wailed the castle down if he hadn't, but the real reason Rowan still had a wooden stick was because Cersei could not bear to see him hurt. As Rowan left Joffrey's room, tears falling from his eyes she felt a sudden urge to run and hug him, to kiss his cheeks, wipe away his tears and tell him it was going to be okay. But she didn't. She went and kissed Joffrey's cheeks, and listened to his stories, but her mind was with Rowan, holding his hand, and giving him all the love and attention he deserved.


	3. Around the Breakfast Table

After Tommen's birth, Cersei finally felt that her family was complete. As she sat around the breakfast table watching her family eat and argue she felt a sense of peace, but also a sense of failure. Robert and Joffrey were arguing about Joffrey's lack of sword skills and his cowardice.

"You never do anything Joffrey! You are lazy and ungrateful." Robert bellowed from the end of the table. "You are useless with a sword and you can barely ride. I think a bastard urchin would be a better king than you! I feel sorry for the kingdom, being left in your incapable hands." Joffrey glared at Robert with venom in his eyes, but e knew that a single word out of tone and he would feel Robert's wrath across his face.

However Jaime, sweet, darling, wonderful Jaime, had decided to fight Joffrey's corner.

"If I may be so bold your grace, I think that your judgement of the young prince is a little unfair. He is actually a very accomplished rider, and whilst his sword skills may leave something to be desired, I am giving him lessons so he will be the best fighter in all of King's Landing."

"It's not your place to judge me or my son. You protect us and nothing more. The boy is incompetent, lazy and useless. He should try to be more like Rowan, strong, brave and intelligent.

"Joffrey has strengths in other areas, he is cunning and will rule this kingdom with a sharp mind." Jaime argued. Robert snorted in disgust,

"He will never amount to anything except being the most hated king in Westeros." Robert roared with laughter and Tommen giggled in his baby chair, whilst Myrcella suppressed a smile. Joffrey snarled at them to shut their mouths or he would cut out their tongues. Myrcella quietened immediately but Tommen was too young to understand and kept laughing at his brother's face, which was contorted with rage.

"Shut up you little bastard" Joffrey screamed and launched at his youngest brother. Rowan jumped across the table and tackled Joffrey to the ground. The grand hall doors opened and Tyrion waddled in. He stopped and stared at his two nephews wrestling on the floor, and secretly hoped that Rowan would win.

Rowan was the only one of Cersei's children who was actually kind to him. Joffrey openly despised him and made fun of him whenever he wanted. Myrcella was polite to him but nothing more as she was a beautiful girl and he knew his appearance disgusted her. Tommen was too young to tell who he was, but Rowan always addressed him as Uncle Tyrion and seemed to genuinely enjoy his company and always listened to his advice over Jaime's, whom Rowan tried to love but was always rejected.

As Cersei watched Jaime and Robert pull Rowan and Joffrey off of each other and march them out of the room she reflected on how her family worked. Joffrey despised Rowan and had shown little love for his other siblings, but Rowan tried his best to protected Myrcella and Tommen from Joffrey's evil temper tantrums. Rowan seemed to love the disfigured imp over her handsome twin, but this may be due to Jaime's hatred of Rowan,for reasons that he could never understand.

She had two parts to her life, the part with Jaime and their children, and the part with Robert and Rowan. It was like she was leading a double life, and if anyone ever discovered what she had done she would be finished. She had a funny feeling that Jon Arryn was digging a little too deep, and if he continued then he may meet an untimely end...


	4. A-R-S-E

**I know its been a long time coming and I'm sorry but I've had loads of coursework ! This is only going to be a short one I think because I'm just tying up loose ends before we dive into book action ! Enjoy !**

The royal family stood on the wall overlooking the bay and gazed into the distance as two ships came into sight. Robert smiled to himself and gave Rowan a cheeky wink before heaving himself off the wall and waddling towards ships to greet his brothers. It was Robert's nameday and he had called both of his brothers to King's Landing to see if they could put aside their differences for one day. He assumed not but it would be fun to watch at any rate.

Renly arrived in port first and rushed to give his eldest brother a warm hug.

"Morning brother!" said Robert, when they had broken apart.

"Only the Morning!" cried Renly in surprise "I feel as if we should be having supper when we arrive at the castle." Robert chuckled at his youngest brother.

"Don't worry Renly, you will never go hungry whilst I'm King" Renly supressed a smile. From the look of Robert, he didn't doubt that.

They both turned as they heard the click of boots on wood and saw Stannis walking towards them.

"Good Morrow Brother" They both shouted gleefully, but Stannis' face remained as hard and stone. He sniffed the air before addressing them,

"Smells like a storm" Stannis said thoughtfully "And there is never anything good about a storm." He offered a stiff hand to Robert and said, without a trace of warmth in his voice

"Happy nameday brother. I hope you enjoy it." Stannis then walked towards Cersei and the children, gave them a curt nod and disappeared behind the wall.

"What a pompous prat!" Renly said when he was gone "Mind you, he always looks like he has a stick up his arse!" They both roared with laughter until Cersei came over to chide them.

"Don't be so rude. There are children here and I don't want the embarrassment when one of them recites something unheard of for small ears." But Robert waved his hand at her and said,

"They will learn soon enough anyway. If you are so concerned they why not take them inside?" Cersei rolled her eyes, scooped Tommen up in her arms and motioned for the rest to follow. Renly rushed after them, picked Myrcella up and swung her around. She squealed with laughter and Tommen struggled to break free of his mother so he too could be swung around.

"Don't be such a baby Myr. It's not that much fun." Joffrey scolded.

"So you don't want a go then?" Renly teased, but Joffrey stuck up his nose and walked inside. Rowan bounded over and gave his uncle a hug, whispering in his ear,

"Ignore Joffrey Uncle, he is an A-R-S-E." Both Renly and Robert laughed but Cersei looked shocked.

"How dare you say that!" Cersei thundered. She put Tommen down and grabbed Rowan's arm, pulling him inside. Renly felt a pang of guilt that his nephew was to be punished, but then he caught sight of Loras milling through the crowd in front of him, and his guilt was forgotten.


End file.
